Can't We get along?

[Ranma Tardis]

I am disturbed from a lot of the recent posts. Desmond told me once that what is important to us now will not be in 5 to 10 years. We need to give this thought when making statements as not to destroy relationships. I would like to see us get along better with each other. The fights are a big turn off to many including me. While I am not perfect and do not pretend to be perfect am trying not to cause problems. I admit to having caused problems in the past but am trying to be a better person in the present. Please try and be nicer to each other, it is my hope we could turn this negative energy into a positive force. Just think at what we could do!
My apologies to Desmond if I misquoted him.

[muhammedyussif]

I agree that the discussions are disturbing nasty and I think the devil is running around between the letters. Perhaps it started with bad jokes and ironies that fuelled hot tempers (excuse my English - perhaps I use the wrong words)

[Arias Ahren]

I agree that the rhetoric is heated and often nasty. I wonder if it is fuelled by bad jokes and tempers. I don't really know and only have a five month history on the Forums to get a sense of it.

I suspect that it is really fuelled by narcissistic, nefarious intent, and deceit. Have these forms always been so contentious? Or are they related to the malignancy of the merger, or something else? One thing I do know it was here well before my arrival.

[Pip Torok]

I agree that the rhetoric is heated and often nasty. I wonder if it is fuelled by bad jokes and tempers. I don't really know and only have a five month history on the Forums to get a sense of it.

I suspect that it is really fuelled by narcissistic, nefarious intent, and deceit. Have these forms always been so contentious? Or are they related to the malignancy of the merger, or something else? One thing I do know it was here well before my arrival.

Hi Arias,

Maybe I can offer some ideas, although it would take a Graduate Researcher in Social Psychology to round them out, support, disprove or otherwise qualify them.

My thinking is that unconscious feelings of aggression are within each of us at every moment of the waking day. But there are two circumstances in particular where they go away.

One is where the expression of that aggression is met by an immediate, direct and painful response. This is characteristic of face-to-face encounters when it occurs. My betting is that, for every actual fight that breaks out, there are at least ten when the aggressor will quickly calculate the gain versus the loss of face (or teeth!), and quietly decide to hold his tongue.

But what if the exchange is not in the street? What if it is on-line, in chat, facebook, USENET or Second Life? Then the aggressor could feel he will get away with it. And when it proves correct, a habit of spilling suppressed nastiness and contumely can easily take hold.

The other is where there is a sudden crisis that involves the Community, from the neighbourhood to a Nation-State. Aggression is indeed displayed, but this time, it's turned outwards. Inside, it's the "Dunkirk Spirit", or those heady days in America immediately after the 11th of September, 2001, or the Troubles in Northern Ireland where each member of both communities is looking-out for each other.

But otherwise? What when it's boringly peaceful? ... and in its most humdrum aspect?

Well, there's Soccer here, and American Football there. There are the releases provided by Saturday Night Binge-drinking, and sexual adventuring ....

Or else ... cheapest of all ... there's the Web!

REPLY LETTER
------------------
Please excuse the pages ripped,
Stranger, in your manuscript,
Places where my pencil tore
Through two sheets and sometimes more.
I've marked some passages so red
They must look as if they'd bled;
And when you see my savage scratches
Setting off your purple patches,
You'll think your book has had a fight
In a pool hall Saturday night.
But that's not true, for I've admired
The way you get my passions fired.
Please understand: I here present
The sincerest form of compliment.

-- Fred C Chappell, 1993

Pip Torok

[Arias Ahren]

Very good points Pip!

[Arias Ahren]

And Pip: let me say, there has in fact been some method to my madness here. We all know there are numerous strategies in love and war: Divide and conquer, straight frontal, feint and parry, three spears, which Lao Tsu almost always recommends, and a number of others. I was just about to sheath my sword when I saw Kas and her formal complaint against Sonja. I had little time so the only option left me was a direct frontal assault: Draw them out, expose them for what they really are was my code and creed. To some degree I have achieved my aim. At least Sonja is still leading the race.

I want to add two things. Sonja at no time has asked for my help or approved of my tactics. They were and still are mine alone. I did what I have done firmly believing that Sonja is a very noble lady, worthy of remaining our leader.

The second point is: Do we really want a single individual to be the dominant force of all three houses of our government?

[Cindy Ecksol]

The second point is: Do we really want a single individual to be the dominant force of all three houses of our government?

Thanks for making such a naive statement, Arias, and proving to pretty much anyone in CDS who has taken the time to get to know me over the last three years that you haven't a clue as to how politics really works around here.

And I expect that Delia is smiling and thinking pretty much the same thing

Cindy

[Arias Ahren]

I think you are right Cindy, but the point was not what you know, or how old you happen to be. The the point is who you are.

Are you saying that knowing you and knowing how "politics works around here" are one and the same? It seems that is what you are saying. I wonder if you really believe it. It seems that you may actually believe your own words. I believe that such thinking is a danger to any free society .

Delia is an adult woman and I think quite capable of speaking for herself. If by some misfortune you should become our chancellor should we expect censorship, scorn, ridicule, and putting the imagined words of others in your mouth?

[Cindy Ecksol]

I think you are right Cindy, but the point was not what you know, or how old you happen to be. The the point is who you are.

Are you saying that knowing you and knowing how "politics works around here" are one and the same? It seems that is what you are saying. I wonder if you really believe it. It seems that you may actually believe your own words. I believe that such thinking is a danger to any free society .

Delia is an adult woman and I think quite capable of speaking for herself. If by some misfortune you should become our chancellor should we expect censorship, scorn, ridicule, and putting the imagined words of others in your mouth?

Well, Arias, being that it's my personal experience on these forums that you're quite expert on putting words into other people's mouths (and thoughts and motivations into their minds), I'm glad to know that your personal contacts with Delia have generated such a positive perception of Delia and that you make no assumptions about what she might or might not say or think.

But considering that you and I have never spoken face to face, you might want to consider that you may be jumping to conclusions about "what I'm saying" or "what I think." And certainly you do not seem to have developed much perspective on "what I might do" if I were elected chancellor. I've been pretty clear on that I think, and very consistent over the last 3 years. I doubt that anyone who has been paying attention would be very surprised by anything that I did in office, nor about how I would go about accomplishing things. And I'm especially curious about how you came to the conclusion that I favor some sort of censorship. Drop by for coffee sometime and let's chat!

Cindy

[Arias Ahren]

I would love to Cindy. You name the time and place and I will do my best to be there.

I came to the conclusion about your need to censor from a number of your posts but particularly due to your many attempts to silence me through ridicule.

[Robert Walpole]

You really DO have a huge chip on your shoulder, old man - as well as the bad habit to act as prosecutor, judge, jury and executioner towards people you don't know and have never met. If you have accomplished all you say you did, do you really need to behave like this on an obscure forum of a virtual reality game to get some sense of gratification and self-worth so late in life? It is you who cover yourself in ridicule, not others.... "Those who have been told the truth should not be taken for those who have been scorned." I mean come on: "I helped end the Vietnam war.... I fight for justice and truth....." Do you really not see how utterly pathetic you sound??? I hope for your own sake it is just a role you play, and not what you really think -otherwise, you need serious professional help. Alternatively, re-read Cervantes and try to understand the sarcasm and irony hiding between the lines... "[Y]ou think you're brave and courageous, when you're really old; you think you're strong, when you're really feeble; you think you can go righting wrongs when age has bent you in half -- and, above all, that you're a knight, when you're not, because even though gentlemen can become knights, poor ones can't!"

[Arias Ahren]

It seems that I may be getting someplace with you at least Robert. But again, I ask what are your motives. Last time I asked, you attempted to be witty but in essence your answer was, to enjoy watching others squirm: A real visionary, a utopian futurist, a sadist. What good do you possibly serve in this community? What good have you ever served in any society. I have been told by many that you misled a number of people into funding a project that you abandoned, that you were extremely disingenuous about your actual financial situation, leading people to believe that you had monies that were never there. Is there any truth in these allegations? Are you a cheat Robert?

You are right, to some degree I am living my dreams vicariously. I was raised honoring chivalry and I am playing the role of the knight attempting to defend the righteous and calling out the liars, the lecherous, the narcissist, the hedonist, and people like you Robert. Unlike you I see this experience as being very worthwhile. I have learned a great deal and have enjoyed my interactions with many fine people involved in this community. I commend Sonja, our chancellor, Arria our past LRA, Pip and I have grown close, Pat I admire for many good reasons. Bags, Solario and Zanna have been quite wonderful. Anna has been stressful at times but she too has been a good teacher. Fran has been an inspiration and Sudane is amazing. I am looking forward to getting to know others. Certainly there are manipulative and controlling people here; people that crush the creative spirit and inhibit self expression. There are people like you Robert, who sit in the back of the gallery taunting, but really you are only standing in the shadows flagellating the only person you really know.

[Ranma Tardis]

Please can we not be civil towards each other. I am still not pointing fingers or playing mind games but am being somewhat overly simple.
I wonder if it is today's society that brings out the worse in people?
My message is simple, no double meanings or such. Please try and be nice to each other.